Lifestyle

Making Big Life Choices: How to Know What You Want

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When you arrive at a crossroads in life, it’s difficult to commit to a path. Knowing that your decision will shape the course of your future is overwhelming, and it can leave you paralysed with indecision. However, if you’re clear on your current situation and future goals, you’ll find it easier to make choices that’ll serve you long-term. Here’s how to know what you want. 

1. Understanding your values

    When faced with a seemingly impossible choice, coming back to your values often illuminates the right course of action. These reflect what matters to you most. Keeping them at the forefront of your mind will help ensure you live life authentically, for greater overall satisfaction. 

    Values are individual. Some people are ambitious, driven by a desire for growth, while others seek peace through balance. Write down five moments from the past few years when you felt genuinely happy with your lifestyle. Looking for patterns in those experiences will help you clarify your priorities. This process also separates your own preferences from family or societal expectations that tend to throw us off course. Moving abroad with work may sound impressive on paper, but if it endangers a beloved work-life balance, the trade-off may not suit you.

    2. Thinking long-term

      The immediate benefits or risks of a choice are usually our main focus, but with major life decisions it’s important to think long-term. These carry lasting consequences far beyond the foreseeable, actively impacting the shape of the future.

      Acknowledge instant emotional reactions to prospective opportunities but put these aside and rationally balance the pros and cons through a long-term lens. This will guide better decisions with significant life planning tasks such as exploring the option of direct cremations or making arrangements for retirement, because it forces you to think practically about what will have the biggest benefit for your future self.

      3. Considering cost

        Cost involves far more than money – although this is a factor that shouldn’t be ignored. You only have so much time and energy, and every choice you make dictates how much of that you’re able to put into each area of life. When considering changes like a promotion, weigh up the toll it would take on your time and well-being alongside the obvious benefits like a higher income. 

        This broader perspective helps you avoid decisions that look attractive initially but create pressures you did not fully anticipate, which could ultimately make them the wrong choice for you.

        close up shot of a curly haired woman lying her head on white table with paper money

        4. Overcoming uncertainty

          Uncertainty often convinces people to delay decisions indefinitely, yet waiting rarely provides more clarity. In fact, it can cause you to lose out on potentially wonderful opportunities altogether. The truth is that you can never be certain of the outcome of your decision, no matter how much information you’re able to find, or how long you think it through. As ice hockey star Wayne Gretzky put so perfectly, ‘you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take’. 

          Having said that, gaining real-world experience gives you a stronger foundation for making a final decision, and confidence grows from knowledge and evidence. Researching unfamiliar subjects is a great way to get reassurance in the face of challenging decisions. You could speak to professionals or peers with real-life experience and look at the possibility of testing options before committing, like platforms that let you practise the art of investing without you paying a penny. 

          5. Creating a plan

            Without a practical route forward, even the best course of action can seem impossible. Breaking a goal into smaller stages using a SMART framework makes your aims feel achievable and makes progress easier to manage and measure. Instead of having to have everything figured out, you simply look to the next rung on the ladder. Small stepping stones still drive progress and will help you stay motivated.

            A written plan also helps because it enables you to maintain perspective when faced with doubts. Big life choices rarely come with guarantees, but realistic expectations and a structured approach in line with values can help you move forward with greater confidence.

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